


Starscream Meets the Cactus Cats

by FoolishGlint



Series: Starscream Meets Cryptids [3]
Category: Transformers: Prime
Genre: Alcohol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:40:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26592286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FoolishGlint/pseuds/FoolishGlint
Summary: They’re here for a good time, not a long time.
Series: Starscream Meets Cryptids [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1930696
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	Starscream Meets the Cactus Cats

It was a hot day, the sun was beating down on Starscream as he walked along the canyon floor. It had been a trying week, and the Harbinger was lifeless and empty, the loneliness was heavy. He had remembered what Wulvar had said to him, to look for the large cactus in the nearby canyon.

Starscream saw the large cactus that was aforementioned and hurried his pace. It was gigantic, three storeys tall, and it casted a large shadow. He frowned slightly. This was the place that Wulvar spoke of. But there was nothing here save a cactus and a large number of holes littering the canyon walls. He sat down in the shade of the cactus for some respite, and stretched, ventilating a little. 

He heard a small gasp and shushes coming from a rock. Starscream glared sharply in the direction of the noise and set his mouth in a thin line, optics filled with anger.

“I do not take kindly to spies. Show yourselves and I might be merciful.” 

There was a pain of betrayal in his spark at the thought of Wulvar setting him up for an ambush. 

There were some whispers and scuffles, and eventually someone walked into sight. Starscream blinked in surprise. It was a tiny green cat, with thin prickles sticking out of it. It was as if someone had sculpted a cat out of cactus. It looked him in the eye, quaking in fear.

“Please don’t hurt us mister. We didn’t mean to spy, honest! We were just curious is all.”

She sounded juvenile, and Starscream felt a little embarrassed for the theatrics he employed.

“It just so happens that I am a gracious mech, so I accept your apology,” he said dismissively. 

She looked at him with childish inquisitiveness. 

“Why are you here at our home?,” she asked.

Several other kittens emerged from behind the rock, all very clearly young.

“Ah, um, an acquaintance of mine told me to visit,” Starscream said carefully. One of the smaller kittens ran up to him, and Starscream shied away in distrust.

“Where did you come from!”, he asked with childish interest.

“Space.”

The kittens ooed and awed at the revelation. Feeling bold, the kitten propped his paws on Starscream’s pede, prompting the others to approach him as well. ‘I could crush them with ease, they’re not worth the energy spent destroying them,’ is what Starscream told himself, even as they began to climb his frame.

“My name is Spunky, and this is my sister Curiousity. What’s your name mister?”

Starscream’s face was twisting with annoyance, he was not smiling, not in the slightest.

“My name is Starscream, little one,” he answered. 

Spunky wriggled in excitement as the others shouted out their names too. The needles protruding from their bodies lightly scratched his frame, but Starscream found he didn’t really mind. He extended his servo to Curiosity, and she stepped onto his palm. 

She was so tiny, he could fit five more Curiosity’s into his palm and have room for more. Starscream gently tickled her chin with a finger, keeping in mind how fragile she was. She purred as loudly as a little kitten could.

Had Starscream been allergic to cuteness, he would have died several times over. All the kittens leapt from their respective Starscream perches into his palm as a vie for his attention.

Except for Sleepy, who continued to lounge on his shoulder pad. 

It was the happiest Starscream had been for a long while. They were unspoiled bu the horrors of war, and carried no burdens on their little kitten shoulders.

Suddenly, there was a snarl from behind. The kittens froze in fear, and tried to make themselves unseen. Starscream twisted to face the perpetrator, sheltering the kittens in his servo. It appeared to be a fully grown cactus cat, and she was livid.

“Spunky, Curiosity, come here this instant!,” she roared.

Starscream relaxed, it was only the mother. Come to think of it, why were there small kittens wandering around without supervision? They whimpered but crawled off Starscream anyways. 

“The rest of you too.”

Once Starscream was devoid of kittens she herded them into one of the tunnels. She turned to Starscream, who began to prepare for a fight. 

Instead she bowed her head and said ,”Thank you for watching the kits.”

He scoffed; “You honestly trust a complete stranger with your offspring? How has your species not died out yet.”

“The only way outsiders can find this place is if they got an invitation. And we only hand those out to people whom’s judgement we trust to be sound,” she spoke slowly as if she was talking to one of her kittens.

“Do you want me to leave,” Starscream asked quietly.

She looked offended.

“Oh no, definitely not. You haven’t even experienced the night life yet.”

“And why should I stay, whats in it for me,” Starscream asked mockingly.

She narrowed her eyes.

“Night is when the rest of use come out and have a time. We’ve even brewed something special for your kind, so that you can partake as well.”

“Unless you’re hiding an energon processor somewhere, I cannot partake of anything,” Starscream said patronizingly. 

“Why don’t you wait and see for yourself then?”

Starscream studied his claws for a moment.

“I guess I have nothing better to do.”

“Then we sleep til sundown,” she yawned and curled up on an arm of the cactus. 

Starscream wasn’t too keen on recharging this early, but at this point he was in too deep. He leaned against the rock, and followed her lead. 

As the sun was setting, the last rays of daylight shone in his face, waking him up. He stretched sleepily. She woke up as well, and they watched as more of her kin came out of the tunnels, carrying various hollowed out gourds. 

They paid Starscream no mind as they placed the gourds around the canyon. He was amazed at their passive aloofness. A few of them greeted him as they began to crowd around the cactus. One of them slashed the cactus and a clear liquid began to spill from the wound. They began to collect the liquid in shallow wooden bowls. 

Lights began to emit from the gourds as the night darkened. The cats drank and made merry conversation. It was a cozy atmosphere, and Starscream felt strangely comforted. He felt someone nudge his pede. It was the mother from earlier, and she carried a bowl of blue liquid in her jaws.

Starscream widened his optics in surprise. He could smell it, it was a weird hybrid of high grade and cactus juice. He took the bowl carefully, and downed it in one go. He could barely taste it, but the concoction was oddly strong. Already there was a buzz in his processor. 

“More,” Starscream commanded, shoving the bowl in her face.

“Having fun,” she asked chastisingly. 

“I am far too sober right now.”

“I don’t even know your name, yet you demand things of me,” she said with false anger as she gave him another bowl.

“I’m surprised that you don’t know everything about me.” He took another swallow; “It’s Starscream, remember it.”

“Charming, my name is Brambles. Remember it.”

They drank together, often commentating on the actions of the more inebriated company. It reminded Starscream of his days on the Nemesis, where he and Knockout sipped high grade and spread scathing gossip. They had a tiff nearly every encounter, and yet Starscream held no real grudge against him.

Starscream closed his optics and took another swig. His vision blurred and eventually went dark. When he awoke, the congregation was gone, as was the cactus. The canyon walls were smooth, and there were no gourds twinkling with light.

The party was over.


End file.
